Cooperative Relationship vs. Labor-Management

I am firmly of the belief that decriminalization of and the combating of stigma towards sex work should be led by sex workers. I also believe that substantial support by clients is an integral part of this process. I have seen some sex worker organizations reject support from clients due to the view that the client is the boss and the sex worker is the employee – a labor vs. management issue. I certainly support any organization approaching the sex worker-client relationship in this manner because it’s not my place to impose my views on another. However, I personally do not conduct this relationship as one that pits one group against the other, as in a standard labor-management situation. I am a one-person business in 2 separate fields, one legal, one not so much (but hopefully legal soon). Although these ventures are not nearly as personal as sex work, they do involve business relationships rather than boss-employee scenarios. This is the way I go about my life as a client. I do not arrive at an appointment in my businesses as an employee, but as an equal partner. I make the rules, set the schedule, and determine the pay. The customer pays me. Neither of us is “boss” – we’re in a cooperative relationship. When I go to an appointment as a client, I understand and willingly (gleefully!) accept that the SW sets the rules, the schedule, and the payment. I am certainly NOT the “boss” and would never take that role. My companion and I are in a mutual business relationship, beneficial to both. I will abide by the rules – no haggling, no passive-aggressive coercion for services or time, no bullshit. “Anything goes” is a misconception shared by much of the uneducated public and far too many clients who feel their $ makes them the boss. It does not. Spending time with a sex worker is a privilege, not an entitlement, and for me, not a case of labor vs. management but more a case of two people enjoying each other’s company and caress within the framework of the sex worker’s comfort level. No more, no less.

Signs Revisited

Thanks to the 5 Man Electrical Band. I can be a bit political…

 

And the Sign Said, “Vote for this candidate –

He’s Gonna Save Your Town”

But when he talked, it wasn’t ‘bout bringing us up,

Just cuttin’ the other guy down.

He didn’t say a word about what would get done,

Just what the other guy wouldn’t do –

I put on my coat, and said, “You want MY vote?

Imagine ME voting for you!”

 

Signs, signs, everywhere are signs

Everybody’s sticking to their own party lines –

Vote for me, not him –

Can’t you read the signs?

 

And the sign said, “Vote for ME

Because I stand for Truth”

But the next thing I know, he’s running the machine

In the voting booth..

“There’s no conflict of interest”, he swore up and down

I’m a God-fearing man, not a sinner”.

I peeked in the Stretch, and said, “God would retch

If you actually came out the winner!”

 

Signs, signs, everywhere are signs,

Everybody’s sticking to their own party lines –

Vote for me, not him –

Can’t you read the signs?

 

Now, listen, mister, can’t you see –

Your vote is wasted unless it’s one for me –

If you don’t belong to the majority,

You got no right to be here!

 

And the sign said, “Everyone enter –

I’m gonna save your world”

And then he put up a picture with guns and bombs

And the American flag unfurled.

So I got me a platform and stood on top,

And these are the words I said,

“How the fuck you gonna save us all

If you can’t even keep all of us fed?”

 

Signs, signs, everywhere are signs,

Littering the scenery while everybody whines.

Do this, don’t do that –

Can’t you read the signs?

My Name Is Rick, Not John!

walk-a-mile-3

  My name is Rick Pettit, and I am a client of sex workers. I am in my 60s, divorced, and unattached. I run my own one-person moderately-unsuccessful service business in a small town in New England. I’m just an ordinary person – not exceptionally “beautiful” or “ugly”, not particularly well-off financially, and certainly not a hub of criminal activity. I am not a “pervert”. I do not “eye little girls with bad intent” like Aqualung. I do not abuse the women I spend time with. Most importantly, I do not “buy” anyone’s body. (There’s not enough room in my closet) I am in favor of total decriminalization of sex work. I try to actively engage the general public in discussion about the facts of sex work, and try to actively dispel the misinformation put forth by those who want to prohibit it for various reasons, some well-meaning but misdirected, some just for profit. The image portrayed in various media of drooling, sleazy “perverts” taking advantage of damaged, drug-ridden providers is meant to herd and de-humanize both sex workers and clients. We are ALL people with lives and feelings, and, yes, bills to pay. In America, money = a level of security = a level of empowerment. The money I give a sex worker makes her life easier, and the time she spends with me has more value than any material wealth to me. My life would be much poorer spiritually without the encounters I’ve shared with the women I have had the great privilege of meeting. I have made many friends in the sex work community, and I will support them however I can. I will continue to do my part by speaking out against the criminalization and stigma sex workers face. I am not afraid to show my face. I am not afraid to use my real name. I am an adult, and how I choose to spend my time and money is MY FUCKING BUSINESS. If I can share a moment or two of pleasure in exchange for a little financial support for a friend, it makes my pleasure all the more complete. I do not speak as a representative for any group – this is my voice only. Let’s recap. My name is Rick Pettit and I support safe, consensual sex work and those who practice it, because you’re supposed to support your friends. Thanks!